Thursday, August 09, 2007


Ouch. Really nothing quite like closing the bar on a Wednesday night. Now, Boston is a candy-ass town, and this bar closed at 1AM, but it is still fucking difficult to get up the next morning...

Which leads to my new guilty pleasure. I do not like that I like it. But I have started to enjoy Red Bull. I don't have them usually, but when I am hung over, they make the world a better place. Now, I'm not saying it's a replacement for coffee!! No. No no no. But it makes the bus ride easier to handle.

The bus ride. Ah. This morning's ride was something else. For some reason, it was packed. Now, I hop on the bus at the second stop. It should not be packed, and normally isn't packed until the fourth or fifth stop. But I was the second to last person to get on at my stop, and I got the second to last seat on the bus.

This did not make the bus driver happy. At the fourth stop, the aisle was full. Anybody getting on after that required a shoe horn. This means that the driver had to spend the whole time yelling "Push it back!" "Is there anymore space back there?" "We need to fit a few more"

Now all this is fine and good and even humorous from the standpoint of a hung over, Red Bull swilling, enjoy a good tirade kinda guy like myself. But there were two really magical moments on this ride.

First, we're at a stop, and he goes to pull into traffic, and some idiot cuts him off.

(Small tangent here. Do not cut off city buses. These guys work hard, deal with everything, are professional drivers, and can crumple anything else on the rode driven by non-professional drivers. They deserve better. Cabbies? Fuck cabbies. Bus drivers? Mad respect.)

So my already pissed off and probably hung over driver gets cut off. He leans on the horn. He then takes his hand (fist) off the horn. The horn stays on. And on. And on. He his now banging the side of the steering wheel, smashing the top of the horn, enraged face, the whole bit. But, of course, he's still driving. Right behind the guy that cut him off. I can only imagine what that dude was thinking looking in his rear view mirror. I'm guessing that he won't be cutting off anymore buses any time soon.

Now the horn didn't shut off for TWO STOPS. The expressions on the new passengers that were trying to board a bus that had too many people on it, with a driver that was madly pounding on the steering wheel while the horn was in perpetual ON mode...It was priceless. It was really just priceless.

So, this all happened fairly early in the ride, and all leads up to the second magical moment. As I said, the bus soon became too full to allow anymore passengers. But the driver still needs to at least stop at the remaining bus stops. As he's saying "Probably too full for you" to some poor soul at one of these stops, they shout back "Is there another one coming behind you?"

"Absolutely" he yells back.

"Thanks" says the poor soul.

Driver closes the door.

Then says "In about 10 or 15 minutes" and drives off.

I don't know if this driver was hung over this morning, like I was. But I'm pretty sure he's gonna be hung over tomorrow.


Blogger cake said...

Ha, ha! Where I live, bars are open later than in BOSTON.

You guys are pansies.

::thumbs nose::

(Though I've got to agree with you about the bus drivers...pretty thankless job.)

August 09, 2007 11:06 AM  
Blogger Sparkle Plenty said...

Very well described! I'm getting these vivid flashbacks to Routes 57, 60, and 65. Route 57 has more students standing in the aisles with their giant backpack butts thrust into your face. Route 65 has more ruthless elderly Russian people jockeying for position. Route 60--a very quiet ride--is perhaps the best bus to have a heart attack on due to the large number of medical personnel. Ah, memories.

August 09, 2007 1:27 PM  
Blogger bacon ace said...

According to Homer Simpson "public transportation is for losers". I'm just saying...

August 09, 2007 1:55 PM  
Blogger bostongraf said...

A quick note. While this particular bar closed at 1AM, the general closing time in Boston is 2AM.

August 09, 2007 1:56 PM  
Blogger bostongraf said...

Homer Simpson also said that Eskimos are make believe and that purple is a fruit...

I'm just saying...

August 09, 2007 2:03 PM  
Blogger Sparkle Plenty said...

Bennies of Busriding
1) Free stranger drool on your shoulder!
2) Free sticky goo on the seat!
3) Stewardesses! And free bacon!

One of these is a lie.

August 09, 2007 2:08 PM  
Blogger cake said...

Bars are open past 2AM here. Yer still pansies!


Oh, okay, that's a lie...that's the same time they close here. I guess we have a tie.

August 09, 2007 9:52 PM  
Blogger crabby said...

It happens to me once. The diffrent was, i sat at the front seat of the bus so i saw the the people at the back of the car, looking scared ..i just worried i missed my stop because he doesn't stop until that car make a turn.

August 10, 2007 12:46 AM  

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